Rainbow Bridge Remembrance Day

Hello and Happy Friday! Today we are joining our friends over at Zee and Zoey's in celebrating Rainbow Bridge Remembrance Day. 

Today is a special day to honor the lost pets in your life. Mommy has written before about her cat Marvin and how much he meant to her, and she decided to write about him again, but with a different twist.  

We hope you participate today in honoring your pets who have made their journey to the bridge, and for those of you who have not read Marvin's story, we hope you enjoy it.  

OK, Mommy, go ahead...

Samantha (L) and Marvin (R)

When people think about the term “soul mate” they think of a romantic relationship when in fact a soul mate can take many different forms and resonate with you on many different levels, such as a best friend or even a family member. A soul mate relationship is one which will be life changing. It is an instant knowing and an uplifting surge of energy from within and the depth of connection you form will last a lifetime. I don’t think it’s any coincidence that some of my soul mates have fur and whiskers. 

I grew up in a cat loving family and we had cats just about my entire life.  When I was 19 my 11 year old cat died from Leukemia. Shortly after that my neighbor’s cat had kittens and being the cat lover that I am I stopped by to see them. When I looked into the box where the kittens were being kept I saw this little energetic ball of black and white fluff scurrying around.  When I picked him up and looked him in the eye (and saw that cute little smudge by his nose that looked like a crooked moustache), I was smitten and I knew he was my cat. Cat owners understand this – you see a cat and you have this instant connection.  When Marvin was eight weeks old he came home and our love story ensued. 

Marvin was my sidekick, my baby, my friend, and a constant in my life full of changes. There was no doubt he was my cat and we had an unbreakable bond.  When he was a kitten he would lay on my chest while I watched TV, just purring away. As he matured he did not grow out of this habit.  As an adult cat he would jump on my lap and put his face in front of mine so I couldn’t see the TV, book or whatever I had in front of me.  Marvin wanted me to have eyes for only him.  When I would bring boyfriends home he would sit on the floor in front of them and give them the stare down. As long as my boyfriend was sitting next to me Marvin would be right there acting as my guardian.  Passing the “Marvin test” was an honor for any boy visiting my house!  When I would go away on vacation he would look for me around the house and sit by the door as if he were waiting for me to come through it at any moment.  So when I would call home to check in my mother would hold the phone out so Marvin could hear my voice. Marvin was my shadow (or maybe I was his), and he was never far from me. 

When I was 31 I ended a long-term relationship and was absolutely devastated when I wasn't able to bring Marvin to live with me in my new apartment.  I cried hysterically to my mother who suggested I ask my soon to be ex-boyfriend if he and his daughter would keep him. They of course said yes, but I was still devastated.  I tried to alleviate my guilt by telling myself he was staying in the home he knew for years, with not only people he knew and who loved him, but he’d stay with his best cat friend, Samantha.  I knew he would be well cared for and that my mother would check on him, but the guilt still ran deep.

After I moved out I was never able to speak about Marvin.  Not having him left a hole in my heart and my life that I thought would be never be filled, and the remorse of leaving him behind never really went away.  My mother respected this and never forced the subject nor did she ever make me think I made the wrong decision. A couple of times she said “I spoke to (ex-boyfriend) and (his daughter).  Marvin and Samantha are good” to which I would respond “OK”. A couple of years after Marvin went to the bridge she mentioned it in passing to me when it fit in a conversation, then continued on with what we were talking about without forcing me to comment. Somehow she knew deep down inside I would want to know – and of course she was right. I went home and cried for the love I lost. 

For the next 16 years I always lived in places that did not allow pets so I never had to think about having one. I did miss the companionship of a pet (and whenever I saw a black and white cat I became euphoric), but I think secretly I was glad I wasn’t able to have one. Marvin was still the love of my life and I didn’t know if another cat could ever mean as much to me. One day in April, 2010 I was in Petco with my family buying supplies for my niece’s new puppy when I came across the Hudson Valley Humane Society’s adoption table. There were several cats waiting for their forever humans, but I only had eyes for the black and white cat named Lexy sitting quietly in a cage. When I petted her my heart began to sing as I remembered my cherished Marvin and the love we felt for each other.  I had no intention of adopting a pet of any kind, but I couldn’t resist asking questions about this little beauty. As much as I didn’t want to admit it, I was once again smitten and I knew right then and there that she needed a home (well, actually she needed ME! Or more accurately, I needed her) and that we were meant to be together.  And we are.

Lexy is not a lap cat and does not appreciate being picked up for hugs, but there is no doubt that I am her human.  She follows me around the house; watches me cook, put on my makeup (or any other task I’m doing); and waits for me at the door.  In the morning when she hears me stirring she runs into the bedroom to greet me good morning with so many head bonks and purrs it’s as if she’s saying “I’m so glad you’re up! I missed you all night!”  She’s fond of my boyfriend, but only I’m the only one she rolls over for to show off her belly. 

Eight months after bringing Lexy home I decided she needed a companion and that’s when I came across Lola’s photo on Facebook. I decided to go to meet her in the hospital where she was being medically boarded just to show support. Even though she isn’t black and white something in her eyes drew me to her.  When I met her the love and affection she showed me reminded me so much of Marvin, and once again my heart began to sing as Lola found her way into it immediately.  

One week later she was discharged and after coming home with me had taken over where Marvin left off. She is constantly by my side and if I’m sitting or lying down she is right on top of me relentlessly showering me with kisses and hugs. She enjoys chatting and constantly “talks” to me to get my attention. 

I never imagined that a cat could have such a lifelong effect on me.  I’m so grateful for Marvin being born just when I needed him and for his memory leading me to open my heart to two other cats who complete my life.  I may be biased, but soul mates with fur and whiskers are the best kind.